And so it begins...

So a factory worker in Sweden got injured during a run-in with some bit of automated machinery yesterday. Seems innocent enough, I guess. The article is available here. Blah, blah, blah. Industrial accident.

One sentence in the report did, however, catch my eye.

"But the robot suddenly came to life and grabbed a tight hold of the victim's head."

Just so everyone is clear on what happened... A ROBOT CAME TO LIFE AND ATTACKED A MAN. A human man, not some audioanimatronic factory worker that shared a kind of perverse kinship with the malfunctioning (allegedly) assemblage. An actual man. Given that this is in clear violation of every human/robot precept, why is every newspaper not printing full page reports on this, or at least putting out special "Well, we're dead for sure" editions?

These editions/ads wouldn't even need an accompanying article, just a black and white spread (with a quick splash of dark fluid...is it blood, or oil...who can tell) and the words A ROBOT CAME TO LIFE AND ATTACKED A MAN. If I were appointed head of the worldwide media cabal, I would use every drop of ink at my disposal and a font of my own devising, Times New Holy Shit Bold, because this seems like that kind of emergency.

Full Disclosure: I originally designed Times New Holy Shit Bold for use with the potential future headline "Infinite Hamburgers!" It saddens me to think that due to impending robot massacre of the human race, we will never see a day that knows no limit on hamburgers.

Book Review: Seagalogy, by Vern.

If my mind had a wrist, this book would have broken it and thrown me through a window.

I normally don't feel like shadow boxing or meditating on the finite nature of man before reading a book. But this book, this awesome and terrifying book, leaves me more than a little worried that its subject, the likewise awesome and terrifying Steven Seagal, is somehow out to get me (or at least knows I am reading about him). The author applies his “Badass Auteur Theory,” or “the idea that in some types of action or badass pictures, it is the badass (or star) who carries through themes from one picture to the next” to the whole of the seagal's oevre, including musical efforts.

If you doubt the strength of the author's theory, ask yourself how any episode of any show would be transformed by even the most fleeting glimpse of Steven Seagal.

The most effective support for B.A.T., though, is the existence of the book itself. Since Seagal appears in it, it becomes a "Steven Seagal Book" rather than just an extremely readable and entertaining journey through all things Seagal. How about a "dizzying look through the seagalian lens, whose refractory power transforms governments into criminal agencies, submarines into helicopters, ponytails into widow's peaks, and of course, arms into pretzels."

Even DND is in on the Beaudrillard ideas.

Baraw's newest album - "Find A New One"

Album Covers

1: Go to http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Special:Random
The first article that appears is the name of your band. Example? How about OSS Detachment 101?

2: Go to http://www.quotationspage.com/random.php3
The last few words of the final quote on the page is your album title. Like...Do about it.

3: Go to http://www.flickr.com/explore/interesting/7days
The third picture in the top row is your award-winning album cover.




4. Use what technomancers call "software" to combine these elements into an album cover.

Surrealism Papers

The papers we talked about in class are here. Choose one and read it. Then, we can talk about it.

Dada, or A users' guide to kung fu art survival (Repost)

From Tuesday we know that Dada was a reaction to the belief that rational thought and culture would elevate mankind to some sort of heightened state. The prevalent view at the time (early 19teens) was that technology, powered by logic and driven by science, would complete man as a species via enlightment and truth. To the founders of Dada, these things had instead lead to World War I, effectively lowering mankind's status beneath possible repair. The only response that made sense, therefore, was a complete abandonment of rational processes.

Their beliefs, by-laws, and boasts can be found in several "Dada Manifestos" from various members of the movement. In particular, we focus on one by Tristan Tzara, called shockingly, Dada Manifesto.

The assignment for Thursday is to figure out what they meant by one of the following statements:

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cubism constructs a cathedral of artistic liver paste

WHAT DOES DADA DO?

expressionism poisons artistic sardines

WHAT DOES DADA DO?

simultaneism is still at its first artistic communion

WHAT DOES DADA DO?

futurism wants to mount in an artistic lyricism-elevator

WHAT DOES DADA DO?

unanism embraces allism and fishes with an artistic line

WHAT DOES DADA DO?

neo-classicism discovers the good deeds of artistic art

WHAT DOES DADA DO?

paroxysm makes a trust of all artistic cheeses

WHAT DOES DADA DO?

ultraism recommends the mixture of these seven artistic things

WHAT DOES DADA DO?

creationism vorticism imagism also propose some artistic recipes

WHAT DOES DADA DO?

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What I want you to do is pick one of these statements (e.g. ultraism recommends the mixture of these seven artistic things) and decipher it. I don't want you to draw connection willy and/or nilly like our earlier exercises, but find out what ultraism is, for example, then what they meant by the 7 artistic things and so on.

Make me understand.